Male Gaze and Patriarchy by Gayathri Yadlapalli

Allegory of time and love by Bronzino, where Venus was positioned in a way that appeals to man.

What is the male gaze? According to Berger John, the author of “Ways of Seeing” it is as simple as “Men act, and women appear”(47). Men are judged by their actions, regardless of how they look, whereas women are judged by their appearance, and treated according to how she appears as opposed to what is she capable of or the values she carries. Any woman from the present or past knows and understands what male gaze is; research shows that women who have a more appealing look have higher chances of getting a job that they want, which means that the more appealing one appears to the male eye, the more they achieve for themselves. And, this is only one example of the male gaze. Men feel a sense of entitlement about the way they look at women and pass judgments on them, it is almost like they have a right to do so.

   Berger talks about paintings in his article and how men made women feel ashamed of their naked body, he goes on to say that “You painted a naked woman because you enjoyed looking at her, you put a mirror in her hand and called it vanity, thus morally condemns using the women whose nakedness you had depicted for your own pleasure” (51). Often times we judge women because of the way she is dressed, how her hair is done or not done, her makeup, her skin color, and many other physical attributes because those are the easiest things to judge a person by, especially a woman.

   Moreover, Patriarchy is something that makes a man more powerful and in control than a woman. We as a society have been told to believe that men are head of the households, the backbone of the families, and overall just superior to a woman. Hooks Bell, the author of  “Understanding Patriarchy” emphasizes on how patriarchy affected her life and shares her experiences as well. Hooks says that “At church they had learned that God created man to rule the world and everything in it and that it was the work of women to help men perform these tasks, to obey, and to always assume a subordinate role in relation to a powerful man” (18).

There are several brands like L'Oreal, and, Neutrogena,  that create products to help women become "fair-skinned"

Growing up in a traditional Indian family, I have been in many situations where my family expected different things from me and different things from my cousins who are boys. I remember my young cousin being yelled at by my grandmother for cooking because it was a “woman’s job” to be in the kitchen, and was not a place for a man. Or, when I was told I couldn’t go out and play because I would get dark in the sun and I would later have a problem finding a suitable boy because no one wants a dark-skinned bride. Moving forward, girls are told every day they are supposed to serve the men in the house, starting with their fathers and brothers, and then their husbands, in-laws, and kids. It is considered their primary duty and everything else in their lives comes secondary and is not as important.

Just like girls feel the pressure to be a certain way starting at a very young age, boys do too. They are told from when they are kids that they need to be responsible, strong, fearless, and also in a way emotionless so they can grow up and support their families. Men are not expected to show any emotion except anger. They cannot emit any vulnerabilities because they resemble “strength”.

Hooks also talks about how society looks at female-headed households, more specifically, how they are different from what is considered a normal family. She says that “ The contemporary presence of female-headed households has led many people to assume that children in these households are not learning patriarchal values because no male is present. They assume that men are the sole teachers of patriarchal thinking. Yet, many female-headed households endorse and promote patriarchal values with far greater passion than two-parent households”(23)(24). Often times when a man is not present in a household, the women in the family try twice as hard to instill the values into their kids, as they don’t want their kids to struggle, or to be seen differently in the society. Families headed by a single mother's are challenged with the struggle implement a non-biased upbringing. Women tend to feel patriarchies are very deeply rooted in our culture and lives. In turn, it is hard for most of us to get past these notions and comprehend that times are evolving and so are views of those in society.

picture created by Favianna Rodriguez about fighting patriarchy

References 

Berger, John. Ways of Seeing; a Book Made by John Berger. British Broadcasting Corporation and Penguin Books, 1972.

Hooks, bell. The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love. Simon & Schuster, 2005.